When in Doubt, Mention Dangerous Snails

Our pal Monkey Boy is very interested in scary things right now, especially dangerous animals. He's created his own book of the world's most dangerous animals, complete with names and drawings. He is a fantastic encyclopedia of dangerous animal facts. At dinner the other night, Ada and Monkey Boy were talking about  another of MB's favorite topics, Scooby Doo. Ada was interested in watching some episodes but MB thought they might be too scary for her.

Ada: I'm not afraid of anything!

MB: What about bad guys?

A: Only if they hurt me.

MB: Are you scared of bombs?

A: Only if they hit me.

MB: Are you scared of the gruncher? (launches into a description of its smoky, fiery fearsomeness)

A: The gruncher is NOT real!

MB, undeterred: Are you scared of 200 bombs and they are circling you?

A: And it exploded next to me?

MB: Yeah.

A: I said I'm not scared of anything!

MB, without missing a beat: There's a snail called the marbled cone snail and it is one of the most dangerous animals! Are you afraid of a marbled cone snail?

They cry. They grow.

Ada's preschool teachers asked all the children a question each month and recorded their answers. The responses are included in the children's portfolios, folders that also contain drawings, project notes and other highlights from the year.  Reading through the answers, I was so charmed by the variety of answers. Here are my favorite responses to some of the monthly questions:

What will you do for Thanksgiving?

L: I love my teachers.
S: I think I'm gonna make birthday cakes and my Grandma is gonna come over for a sleepover and I think Jack and Owen and James are gonna have a sleepover and you can come too, but my mom has a very tall bed so I think you should sleep in it because my bed is just big enough for me and Charlotte and Evelyn.
L: I don't know yet. I think we're gonna go over to my Papa's house and have a little malt-o-meal, we might do that.

What do you know about babies?

A: That they love to do dangerous things like play with electricity.
J: I know 2 things about babies: they have umbilical cords and they also like to swallow marbles.
M: My baby was sleeping on mine head.
M: They cry.
L: They grow.

What was your favorite gift you gave? 

E: I had a cardboard picture to give to Grandma but I missed out because I didn't do that.
Ada: I made a present for Lila. I gave her some of my toys.
S: I gave my mom's mom some pictures in a box and we wrapped it up in wrapping paper to make it look pretty - of Christmas trees. The only picture I can remember is of a smiling robot.

What was your favorite gift you received?

F: I got a tape dispenser and I got a wind-up truck with no body, just wheels and a mouth and a fin sticking up. And I got something that you fold inside out, you drop down and it comes outside in, but you have to fold it inside out first.
L: I got Belle princess and Barbie and I got this princess that puts her legs in the air.
Ada: I got two favorite presents, a pirate ship and a bike with training wheels.

What is something that makes you feel afraid?

A: Lions.
A: Chickens.
Ada: Being lost.
A: Black widows and dinosaurs, giant dinosaurs that are bigger than the whole world.
D: Big shadows, I mean trees.
S: When all of these people, my friends, said they would put me in the hole we dug and they would dig it really deep and there would be hot lava.
S: I'm afraid of T-Rex...um, and glass, cause if it breaks you get your foot cut, that's why I'm scared.

What do you want to be when you grow up?

D: A baker.
J: I don't know. I think the thing I would do best would be police. It sounds fun.
A: I'm gonna be a daddy when I grow up. I also want to be a guy that races in a race car on a race track and I want the number on the car to be 200.
A: I want to be nothing. I will just play.
Ada: A mermaid.
M: A butterfly.
F: A paleontologist.
C: I want to take care of my neighbor's dog.
L: A gummy person that eats all the gum.

What's your favorite kind of pie?

B: Raspberry, pear, strawberry pie.
L: Futon pie. It has nuts in it.
L: Strawberry shortcake.
J: My mom and dad don't know any recipes for pies and I've never had pie.
A: I don't have a favorite. I think it will be strawberry.

What signs of spring do you see in the world?
  
M: If spring is coming it will be pink and purple with butterflies.
A: I saw pink blossoms when I was going to swim lessons and I have a little pink plant.
M: When I wake up from wake up time and it feels like spring, I smell popsicles.

What is your favorite thing about the Earth?

J: Cause all my friends are on Earth.
A: That I can see stars.
L: I love the tomatoes on Earth.
M: That I want to go in rockets.
L: That there can be different weather in each state.
Ada: My mom gets to have babies.

Does it help to look away?

Two girls come scooting past me toward the bathroom. Ada yells out, "I have to use the potty!"

"Great" I say, just as the friend runs into the room saying, "me too! I have to go too!"

Ada (from the bathroom): "I really have to go NOW. You can pee on the carpet."

Jumping up, I run into the bathroom to tell the friend, "if you really need to go, you can come upstairs."

Friend: "No. I can wait."

Ada: "You can cross your legs and look away."

I am not surprised they lost their appetites

Ada and Lila were eating dinner at our house. They started out pretending to be kittens. (Which by the way, yay! Kittens LOVE milk! These kittens drank several glasses.) After a bit they started talking about going to Disneyland with their children. 

Lila: I am going to have a baby. If you want kids you have to have babies, right?

Ada: But I don't want surgery.
(Why would she worry about this? Neither she, Lila or their siblings was born by c-section. Until today I wasn't even sure she knew that babies could be born this way.)

Lila: Everyone gets surgery at some point.
(See, this is what's wrong with the U.S. health care system.)

(some chatter about surgery and cutting and babies that went by too fast for me to understand, much less transcribe)

Lila: When your baby is inside of you it really really hurts. They don't want to cut too deep because it will cut your baby and it would be dead. It would cut your baby's head. And I don't think you can have a baby with no head.

(whisper whisper)

Ada: We aren't hungry any more.

Lila: Yeah. We don't want to finish our dinner.

** * ** * **

I love listening to them. Where else does dinner conversation range from Snow White to surgery?