Saturday, May 03, 2008

Advice for new moms and those who have forgotten

The early days of life with a new baby knock everyone for a loop. When Jana put out a call for advice for soon-to-be second time moms Her Bad Mother, Mrs. Chicky and Mrs. Chicken, I immediately thought of the long nights nursing and listening to the middle-of-the night noises I rarely heard before Ada came along. With that in mind, and hopefully also offering some help to my friend (and new mom) Stephanie, I offer the following night advice:

(1) Do not ever comment on what a good sleeper your child is.

(2) Magical thinking works on babies - your strong belief that if you count to 70 and then put your child down she will stay asleep is correct, not a sign of psychosis.

(3) When co-sleeping, no matter how uncomfortable you are, remember that shifting position will cause your baby to wake up and demand to be fed. Be sure to wake your partner for the diaper change.

(4) If your child is inconsolable, a ride in the car may work wonders. Plus, if you get thirsty driving around town, you can always stop at taco bell for a soda. Sprite has healing powers after 1am.

(5) That urge to throw the baby out the window is probably normal, but just in case, hand the baby off to your partner and get some sleep.

4 comments:

  1. All of the above are so true - especially number 5. And 4, and 3, 2 and 1.

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  2. Oh, gosh, you are so right on the money with no. 1! Thank you for all the great advice.

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  3. All so totally true! Kids are spooky that way, aren't they?

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  4. Magical thinking does work?

    AM SO GOING TO THINK MAGICALLY.

    (does it get babies OUT, too?)

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