Nature is clearly not an entirely benign force, but once in a while we get something so charming that the cruelties can be, if not forgotten, at least momentarily forgiven.
I am not one of those women who revel in infancy. I don't believe all newborns are beautiful. Sure, I love the smell of a baby's head, but give me a soft round 6 month old and I am much more prone to melt than I am when faced with a skinny baby only a month along.
But once in a while... The other night I had one of those moments that stays with you when the memory of infancy's exhaustion and tears fade. Mira was fed and I was rocking her to sleep. She was in that groggy but not quite sleeping state when she suddenly flicked her eyes wide and flashed me a huge grin, complete with a big chortle. It was just a few seconds, but it seemed to last longer than that before her eyes closed and she was really asleep. The moment left me so charmed and elated, even though I knew she was not smiling at me or rewarding me for something I had done. But still, it was a reward, one that at 5 weeks helped tow me into a future where there will be real smiles, not to mention other real joys and challenges. Oh, I do love infancy, as long as it is as truly fleeting as everyone keeps reminding me to remember that it is.
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My god, she's cute.
ReplyDeleteLook at that huge baby you've made! Also. I want to bring you my pram. It is big enough for two and well, we didn't buy it new.
ReplyDeleteI was just thinking yesterday that I wished I could enjoy this time more, but it's just SO MUCH. But they're certainly worth it all :)
ReplyDeleteAdorable.
ReplyDeleteGot my (your) heads on a stick yesterday. Can't wait to take pix!
Lovely lovely. I wanted to pass this blog suggestion on to you, even though I know you probably don't have any time. Anyway, it's mostly photos so it doesn't require lots of reading. I just think that it suits your tastes - cityofsadtoys.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteThinking of you, C.
Those cheeks make me wish that BlogHer was in Portland, dammit.
ReplyDeleteAw, she's cute!
ReplyDeleteI'm not really one for the newborn stage either. Although it does have it's benefits; unable talk back, easily contained, easily entertained.
SMOOSHY! Kiss kiss kiss! It KILLS me, the cuteness. Kills me.
ReplyDeleteI love those first smiles! My fave is still when they look up while nursing with that little trickle of milk out the side of their mouth. That smile just melted me!
ReplyDeleteThose first three months were the most overwhelming of my life, but that first time that Builder Boy smiled at me at 7 weeks, I knew I would get past the fatigue, post-partum depression, and sore boobs! You amaze me that you are still writing so frequently!!!
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